Zeeyqa, Fourteen, Malaysian.
I'm not your Barbie doll. Weird and random. Lovestruk idiot. Broken and fragile. A big mess. Mayday Parade and Simple Plan. Alternative rock. Vampire Diaries and The Orignals, Damon Salvatore and Niklaus Mikaelson. I don't believe in forever. When I fall, I fall hard. Giving too much fucks is my problem. Bruises, cuts and scars. I don't let you see the good in me. I love and I hate. Trying to live life to the fullest. This is who I am. Infinite x's and o's.
Thursday, 26 January 2012 @ 23:59
People think depression is about being sad. They think it’s just when you ‘feel down’. It’s not. It’s like a darkness that creeps over you and fills you. It drains all your emotions. It takes everything from you, and leaves you feeling hollow and numb. It’s not sadness, it’s not anger, it’s hopelessness. Imagine waking up and there being no color. Walking outside and feeling no wind. Eating a meal and tasting nothing. Holding someone and feeling completely alone at the same time. When you’re depressed, it’s not a bad mood. It’s a numb, empty, hollowness that seems to never leave. It’s feeling alone in a room full of people. You feel like there’s no hope left.
Depressed. Hurt. Sad. Broken. Useless. Alone. Pathetic. Crushed. Empty. Perfect words to describe me.
I don't blame you for hurting me but I blame myself for expecting something from you. Le sigh.